How To Love Secretly
by que.t.3.14
Summary: Shino has seen Misami become the woman she is. He has been her teacher, her senior, and her teammate, but somewhere along the way he has fallen for her. He's drawn to her like a moth to a flame only he's not sure who's in more danger because of it. So he'll just have to keep it to himself and avoid her as much as possible. Rated M for: sexual content.


This was supposed to be a one shot, but you can expect a few more related stories 3 How to Make Love will definitely happen and I'm toying with a few other ideas...

As always please feel free to comment, I do take requests, and of course:

**I do NOT own Naruto.**

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Shino's dark eyes slyly watched the woman that flitted about the kitchen so gracefully. She was a quietly humming as she prepared the food, working at the same slow pace of her song. Something inside Shino rumbled in impatience. Hunger. Hunger for something he couldn't have, or perhaps just shouldn't have.

He had promised to spend time with her soon. He'd been saying that since the the early cherry blossom festival and it was now the first of July. When he saw her this morning she had nearly latched onto him, grocery bags in hand, begging him to come over for a meal. Today was the hottest day of the summer yet and the feather light dress she wore was enough to make him lick his lips. She was glistening slightly with sweat and her hair was falling out of the loose bun she had put it in. Even in ninety-eight degree weather she was flawless.

Kiba had been with him during the exchange and that didn't help in the slightest. _"We'll be done by one, definitely not to late for a good lunch!"_

Misami's eyes lit up as she looked to Shino expectantly. _"We haven't really spent any time together since the cherry blossom festival..."_

There would be no escaping it. He couldn't directly reject her. He couldn't even tell her no when he was her teacher, let alone now that he had no authority over her. Those glittering blue eyes did something to him that just wasn't fair.

Misaki stopped suddenly and took a moment to let down her hair and Shino felt an unnatural urge to run his fingers though it. Never in his whole life had he wanted to touch something, someone, so badly.

"Misami." He said her name almost sharply.

The girl turned to him, long blonde hair slipping over her bare shoulders as her bright blue eyes focused on him. "Hm...?"

Shino was silent for a moment, glad for the amount of fabric that covered his face and the dark glasses that he wore. With these she couldn't possibly tell that he was blatantly staring at her beauty. She was the picture of innocence. A petite, doe-eyed blonde that any man would want.

"I should not be here." He said as he suddenly got to his feet.

Misami's features quickly turned from curious to frustrated and disappointed.

"Shino-san!"

"I'm sorry." He replied before she could continue.

Her face fell further. "You always tell me what you shouldn't do. You've been avoiding me for months..." She turned her face from him. "You promised though, that you'd come over today..." Her voice got softer and Shino nearly flinched at the hurt in her voice.

"I did come over, I just cannot stay."

He watched her shoulder's tense and he couldn't stop himself from letting his eyes trail down her body. She was wearing a small spaghetti-strap white dress that floated away from her in an almost ethereal way. Her thin spidery legs far to exposed as well her shoulders, back... His thoughts of her exposed skin came to a halt with her next words.

"Did someone tell you?" Her voice was hardly a whisper.

Shino waited a moment to respond. "Tell me what?"

She turned to him with tears brimming in her eyes and her lower lip caught between her teeth. "Don't play stupid for my sake! Someone must have told you or else you wouldn't be avoiding me!" Her voice was loud, but strained, and frankly it alarmed him. He had never heard her talk like that. Not his sweet, innocent Misami. She didn't get mad or upset. She was calm, collected, intelligent, and the most patient woman he had ever met.

Even as a child she had been unnaturally quiet. Not shy like Hinata, not brooding like Sasuke, not withdrawn like him, but simply contemplative. She watched the world with silence and always responded with a grace he could never understand. She didn't fear speaking her mind, she simply waited to do so until she knew exactly what she wished to say. When she was ready she would speak. Never once in the many years he had known her had he seen her get this upset.

"Misami..." he stepped into the kitchen and she watched him carefully. Hurt and something... defensive played on her features. "What are you talking about?"

"I told you not to play stupid! You've been avoiding me! I want to know who told you is all..." She turned her face away from him again. "I understand if it's made you uncomfortable... but..."

Shino's mind played over every conversation about Misami that he'd had in the last few months. The list was short, and nothing remarkable was in any of the conversations.

"You are not making any sense."

Her eyes snapped back to him and she turned away from him completely. "It is so hard to talk to you when you have those stupid glasses on!" She nearly yelled.

Shino blinked in surprise again.

He didn't know what to do.

Now she was raising her voice at him? What on earth was going on? What had made lovely Misami so volatile all the sudden? What could anyone have told him that would have made her so upset?

He thought for a moment, now double checking all conversations he'd had in the last few months. Absolutely nothing came to mind. He'd have to go about this a different way. He hesitantly removed his glasses and set them on the kitchen counter.

Misami glanced over her shoulder at the glasses but didn't turn around.

"The mask too..." her voice had lowered considerably in volume but she still sounded upset.

Shino again hesitated, mentally reminding himself that if he did this he would need to be much more guarded about how he looked at her. He removed the mask all the same and spoke calmly. "Now explain to me what you are talking about."

Misami hesitated as well, taking a moment to turn around and another moment to finally look into his eyes.

Shino had to hold himself steady as he made eye contact with her for the first time. Her eyes seemed to look straight into him and they both stood in silence for a moment before she spoke.

Her cheeks slowly flushed as she began. "You've been avoiding me... and I know the only reason you would do that was if..." she paused and seemed to struggle for words. Something else he had never witnessed.

Shino waited patiently as Misami collected her words.

"You always say things like _shouldn't_ or _can't_ not that you're busy or have something else to do but that it wouldn't be right. At least, that's how it sounds. I realize it has to be because you've found out and it's made you uncomfortable. I understand you don't feel that it's appropriate... but I want to know who told you..."

Shino listened and watched her cheeks continue to turn a darker shade of red. "I am sorry, my intention was not to avoid you. I assure you my reasons were not because of something I was told."

Her eyes widened slightly before narrowing in frustration yet again.

"So you are avoiding me?"

Shino stopped. That wasn't what he had said was it? "No, I just informed you that was not my intention."

"Then what was?!" She demanded.

Shino hesitated. "I was trying to create an appropriate distance." Truthfully he was drawn to her like a moth to flame and he knew it was just as bad for her as it was for him.

The look that followed was pure heartbreak. "So no one told you, you just figured it out?" She asked quietly.

Shino watched her in utter confusion. What on earth was going on? What had he supposedly heard and now somehow figured out?

"Misami? I apologize. I am afraid I still do not..."

"NO." Her words were sharp. "Don't respond yet."

Shino snapped his mouth shut.

"I never got to say it. I always planned on telling you. Now that you know it's pointless but I still want to openly confess to you."

Shino's eyes widened. Confess? What? What was she...?

"I love you."

Her words shattered in his ears.

"I always have. Even when you were my teacher, my senior, my teammate... the whole time... I've always loved you. I know there's a big age difference, and that it isn't right for me to love you. I understand why you feel we need distance. I'm sorry I didn't tell you myself..."

Shino's mouth dropped open in disbelief. Surely he was just hearing things, or this was just some type of joke. It couldn't be possible. He'd known her since she was so young, watched her age and mature into a beautiful young woman and a strong shinobi. There was no way that he could have missed something like her being in love with him. Especially since he felt so deeply for her.

"I understand if you don't want to be around me any more. Like I said before I know it isn't right... but if you would allow me one small thing? A parting gift..."

Shino literally felt like he was being torn in two. If she felt the same way... then it was alright? How could he walk away from that when it was what he had wanted so badly? It was wrong though. It had to be wrong. Letting feelings grow for some one almost ten years younger than him. There was nothing right about that. It wasn't fair to her. It couldn't be justified. Even if she was an adult now.

Shino's mind spun with thoughts that distracted him from noticing Misami step forward.

Her hand on his chest yanked him from his thoughts and back to reality of this young beauty _touching_ him. Her long delicate fingers splayed out on his chest and her her expression desperate as she looked up at him.

"Mi...sa..." his voice broke as she leaned up with her lips only just hovering over his. She hesitated a moment to place her lips over his and that was it.

Shino snapped.

He grabbed both of her wrists and pushed her back into the counter, pulling her wrists up and placing both of her slender wrists in one hand. She gasped in surprise and he used that to press himself deeper into the kiss, claiming her mouth and using his free hand to slide down her side. He wasted no time in letting his hand slip beneath her dress, literally sighing at the feel of her under his rough hands. He lifted her slightly pulling at one leg and guiding her to wrap her legs around his waist and sit on the counter top.

"Shi-shino-san..." she stuttered into his lips while still doing as his hand guided her to and wrapping her legs tightly around his waist.

He opened his eyes to look directly into hers before he realized himself and pulled back slightly. "I apologize. I forgot myself once you kissed me." He spoke softly. He was quiet for a moment and he could see her searching his face for a reason. She was back to carefully deciding before speaking. He smiled lightly. "You have become such a beautiful woman..." he said while lightly tracing his thumb over her lips.

"If you feel the same way, then marry me." He said definitively.

Her eyes widened and her lips parted in a way he just couldn't resist. He quickly stole a kiss, much lighter than the one he had given previously. "I will not wait long for an answer." Shino said as she studied him.

"Yes. This weekend." She demanded softly.

He couldn't help but smirk. "No. My family will desire a proper engagement and wedding. I will buy you a ring this weekend and marry you before the end of the year."

She frowned slightly, furrowing her brow as she considered the offer. "It is already summer, Misami, you will not be waiting long. Do not be so impatient." He said again lightly kissing her lips.

"I have waited long enough." She said firmly.

"You are twenty, you have only been of age for a few years. It could not have happened much sooner." He pointed out.

She paused before responding. "How long have you felt the same way?"

Shino frowned momentarily. "I saw you kiss Konohamaru..."

"Kono-san?" She paused for a moment as though trying to remember. "That was my seventeenth birthday."

Shino nodded. "You went out for three months."

Misami shook her head. "We never went out. He was trying to make Hanabi jealous. I simply agreed to help."

Shino's hand tightened around her wrists. "You let him kiss you for such a reason?"

Misami blushed, but defended herself all the same. "Hanabi and I are friends. She has a hard time understanding her own feelings. I was just trying to help."

Shino was quiet for a moment. That was so like her. He released her hands then and she let them rest on his shoulders.

She then giggled softly. "I should've engaged in more PDA then if that's what caused you to realize it."

Shino frowned. "I do not think that would have helped the situation." He said pointedly before pressing his lips against hers again.

Misami kissed back this time smiling as she did so and letting her arms wrap around his neck to pull him closer.

"Impatience does not suit you." Shino said with a small teasing smile.

"Says the man that pinned me to a kitchen cupboard."

"That was simply a reaction to you kissing me, it has nothing to with impatience." He said simply, letting his hands slide up her bare thighs. Even with the sun beating in through the kitchen window her skin was cool to the touch.

Misami rolled her eyes.

Shino stopped his hands as they neared her waist, and a serious expression washed over him. "Shall we wait?"

Misami blinked in confusion. "Wait...?" She repeated without understanding.

Shino inched his hands further up her thighs, slowly regaining his own restraint to the situation.

Misami's cheeks turned a light shade of pink and she stayed quiet while she carefully considered his question.

Shino felt his age come into play at this point. Him being more experienced it should be him who took the lead in this. "Have you done anything before?" She had seemed surprisingly comfortable with him pinning her to the cabinet, but that could have simply been love or trust or even just the cool of a shinobi under pressure.

"I haven't done much..." She admitted quietly.

"Then we will wait," he said kissing her lips softly. "We will start slow..." he murmured against her lips quietly while his hands trailed back down her legs, re-exploring what he had already claimed. He secretly loved the fact that he would be forced to take his time. Savoring his experiences with her would be easier if he knew that was what she needed, other wise he might have given into his own impatience.

Shino gently pressed his hips into hers, grinning some as she gasped. "I will take my time in showing you how to make love," his words were low and quiet, barely even whispered as he kissed her lips again.


End file.
